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I know this subject seems miles away from my normal area of expertise, but please have a look & let me know what you think.

I am so sickened by the whole Royal Bank of Scotland bonus debate. It is a small, almost irrelevant, part of a much larger and infinitely more important question which is that of the real responsibility of banking and bankers for the current global misery of recession.

I spent fourteen years as an Investment Banker working for seven different so-called global banks. I was based in London, but travelled extensively during that time.

The year was 1982 or ‘83. I applied for my first job in banking in part because I did know what else to do. I had a law degree and was heading for a rather dull, but thoroughly respectable job in a small North London Solicitor’s firm. I applied for a Graduate Trainee job with the then rising house of Nomura. Much to my surprise, I was invited to attend an interview. I knew nothing about Japan and even less about Investment Banking. Realising that this interview could be a massive opportunity for me, I needed a crash course in Investment Banking, and in matters Japanese, if I was to have any chance of landing a job away from the world of Law.

I had two weeks to prepare for my interview.

I covered the Japanese element in a number of what now look like rather amusing ways. I had a hair-cut at a Japanese Barber’s shop, I went for my first meal in a Japanese restaurant and I read the novel Shogun from cover to cover, writing down any Japanese phrase and words, their English meanings and committing them to memory.

To address my shortcomings in financial knowledge I read the Financial Times every day and I devoured any copies of The Economist I could get hold of. I needed more. As I concentrated more on the interview, I became more and more determined to do anything I could to acquit myself well. I needed to meet someone on the inside. Not someone inside Nomura, but someone who really understood how the world worked inside The City, especially for graduates new to that particular world.

I remembered having met, a few months previously, a friend of one of my fellow students at Law College. The friend of my friend had been at Oxford with him and was generally regarded as a rising superstar. He had always had a clear vision of working in a top league bank in The City of London and, I believe, was offered a job by all but one of the dozen or so banks to which he applied. Of his many offers, he had chosen to work for Credit Suisse First Boston, known as CSFB and had started there at around the same time that I had started my one year course at The College of Law. CSFB was the London based subsidiary of the then Swiss banking giant, Credit Suisse.

I telephoned Stephen Hester at his workplace and explained that I needed his help if I was to stand any chance of success in my impending Nomura interview. Hester, whom I had only met briefly before, checked his diary and said that the only way he could help was if I could collect him at nine O’clock the following Friday evening, from his office. Already the consummate banker, he knew that his advice had a serious market value. We struck a deal that I would buy a Chinese Takeaway for us both which we would eat at his flat in return for his crash course in Investment Banking.

Buying a Chinese Takeaway for Stephen Hester was without doubt the wisest investment I have ever made. Hester and I stayed talking in his small flat until the early hours of Saturday morning. I suppose I was there for around six hours in total.  Hester was without doubt the cleverest person I had ever met and possibly remains so. He gave me, in a few short hours what amounted to a passport into a totally new world. Calmly, and with extreme patience, he led me through the workings of international debt and equity markets. He furnished me with a list of questions to ask at my interview which would simultaneously educate me and impress my interviewer. He answered my own list of questions gathered from my week and a half of deep enquiry into banking. I remember Hester as a very serious person, but someone who had a clear view of a wider world outside his workplace. I remember him as humorous, patient and very, very bright. Even then he had a rare combination of presence and lightness of touch.

I sailed through the Nomura interview process and, in due course, was offered one of twelve jobs out of 600 applicants. My new employers were so impressed with me that they took me out of the Graduate scheme and put me straight into a front line position in the New Issues Bond Syndication Team. The extent to which I lived up to their expectations is a whole other story.

I think I met Hester perhaps a couple of times in the next few years. I hope I was well-mannered enough to write to him by way of thanks, I honestly cannot remember. Despite not having had any contact with him for many years, I have always remained, and always will remain, grateful to him.

Hearing and reading the constant bleating of pundits on whether or not Hester should be paid a bonus, and if he should, how much, sickens me. It sickens me because it is a distraction. It is a distraction from the real issues which are destroying communities, destroying businesses and destroying lives. The RBS bonus debate, focusing mainly on Hester, cloaks the real issues behind the financial mess, what caused it and what can be done to resolve it.

Now that it has been decided to award Hester with an almost £1 million share-holding in RBS by way of bonus, the debate has exploded again.

I certainly do not have all the answers, I doubt whether any single person has. I am certain though that unless Hester has become a very stupid man in the nearly thirty years since I knew him, in which case he should not have been hired to run RBS, he is likely to be worth all he is paid, bonus included, and probably considerably more. I am far too busy trying to survive as a farmer, restaurateur & shop keeper to be able to research this properly but Hester seems to have managed to stabilise RBS.

Stand back for a moment and think about it. Even in my banking days more than fifteen years ago RBS was regarded as a basket case on the Investment Banking and Derivatives side. Structures it came up with and deals it won regularly left other experts scratching their heads in wonderment at how the numbers worked. Obviously we know the answer now. They didn’t work, the numbers did not add up. Add to that, the most extraordinary chaos in financial markets in living memory. Saving, running and then resuscitating RBS is a job way beyond most people. RBS is a huge publicly owned asset. It is central to the financial future and well-being of us all. As I understand it Hester’s bonus is made up of shares. This is surely the best way to continue to motivate him to succeed. If RBS collapses, his shares will be worthless, as will those that we, the people, own. If RBS recovers and its share price recovers, Hester will do extremely well, as will all its other shareholders, some 80% of whom are The Great British Public.

If the ongoing job of reviving RBS can be done by a Muppet, let’s find that Muppet, pay the going rate for Muppets and say goodbye to Hester. On the other hand, unless Hester has become a dribbling useless fool, the decision is fairly simple.

Who is the best person for the job? If Hester is still that person, let’s pay him the going rate, give him the support he needs and let him get on with what is a near impossible job.

This government is at serious risk of falling into the same traps which caught out the last government. It needs to recognise value where it lies. It needs to analyse risk where it lurks and it needs to get on with freeing up the clogged wheels of business, productivity and innovation.

 

Jan McCourt

Northfield Farm

27th January 2012

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Delivering Piglets

Sorry if this is a bit long, but I hope it puts the reader right into the straw with me & shares the gore & the glory of the experience.

 

I got back to the farm from a night away and went straight to check our first British Lop Sow Sally. She had seven piglets scrambling around her teats and her ‘lady bits’. Some were clean and bright while others still had a thick layer of mucus around most of their body. Thanks to their determination these had at least broken through sufficiently to breathe. I cleaned the piglets up with some clean straw and settled mother and little ones down. Then I watched quietly for about five minutes. The scene of quiet had me fairly convinced that there were no more piglets to come, so I headed into the house to catch up on a variety of issues that required my attention, waded through the carnage created by the young Labrador puppies overnight and headed upstairs to change into clothes more appropriate to porcine midwifery.  When I got back to the farrowing pen, barely ten minutes later, five more piglets were squirming about. As I set to cleaning these up, small shrivelled, black mummified Halloween, horror story of a creature slid out of her back end.  Sows quite often give birth to these distorted mini versions of themselves. They tend to have died at a much earlier stage of the pregnancy, and though often quite putrid, the sow seals the monstrosity in its bag so that it rarely affects the rest of the litter. I set the nasty mess immediately to one side just as more slithering hot baby pigs began to squirt out of the mother. They were now coming so quickly that I barely had time to assess each one as it landed onto the straw bedding. I quickly pulled each piglet, firmly but gently away from the mother so that the umbilical cord would shred in a natural way. Cut the cord and the piglet chances bleeding to death. Next I would clear the mucus from around the head and pass my finger through the mouth as far back as I could without choking off the air supply. Eight more slipped out like sausages out of a machine. Unfortunate imagery, I know, but accurate. Two came out and unlike the others were neither breathing nor wriggling. I took the first, went through the routine described above, rubbed its side roughly with clean straw, still no sign of life. I then held it upside down and patted its sides quite smartly while swing it gently but bringing it to a fairly sharp halt at the bottom of each swing. These actions combined seek to clear the airwaves and shock the pathetic little creature’s system back into life.  This all takes quite a few moments of concentrated activity during which it is just about possible to continue to go through the basic actions needed to process the other slithering lives as they pop out. An immediate decision needed to be made, however, as I certainly do not have the skill to do this to two unbreathing piglets simultaneously as well as tending to all the others. I put the second unbreathing piglet to one side. Fortunately after a few minutes of application the heart of the still corpse in my hands began to beat, although the lungs were not pumping and the eyes were still firmly closed. The gently beating heart encouraged me to continue until the eyes opened slowly and the little mite took its first breath. Now breathing, but with no strength or co-ordination in its body or legs, I inserted the good sized but paralysed piglet in among its siblings to keep it warm. I checked through the other piglets and attended to the last few newborns. Nineteen live in all. Putting the little near dead piglet in with its fellows also meant that it was jostled constantly by the general push and bustle for a limited number of teats. This often works as a way of massaging the life back into these borderline cases. I checked on this one regularly over the following hours or so and each time it was a little stronger until it was soon impossible to recognise it among it fellow guzzlers.

It is nearing mid night. I have sat with Sally and her 19 survivors since around 4 O’clock. I am writing during one of the many lulls in activity. A very jolly Spanish themed Chieftains tune is playing via Itunes on my laptop. At this moment a cockerel across roosting with his girlfriend on the side of another farrowing pen decides that he really want to join in with the jolly tune and starts crowing very loudly indeed. Sally has decide to dig around to find the somewhat well-trodden placentas which she has firmly ejected over the last few hours and have a goulish but very important midnight feast. I have made a cordon of packed straw and half pushed, half thrown, gently of course, all nineteen piglets into the corner under the low heat lamp, and managed to persuade them that this is the safest place for them until their mother settles down again. Her snack completed, Sally tries to impress upon me that she really should be allowed to squeeze in with and on top of her babies, which of course would mean that I might as well be in bed and just let nature take its course. Trouble is that nature in this instance would probably see no more than one third of her babies survive. Of course, even with all my efforts, this may be still what happens.  Persuading a very large and determined sow that she should not lie down on top of her offspring under a very inviting heat lamp, is none too easy, but eventually we compromise and I allow Sally to lie with her head next to the pile of wriggling, but content piglets.

I wrote this in early 2009. I was driving over London Bridge on my way to Borough Market. The financial world was dancing on its head. The Borough Market management seemed to be living on a different planet from normal mortals and the future looked very uncertain indeed.

The sun was shining brightly and as my car crawled through the traffic I saw a group of striking women standing on the edge of the bridge holding and waving enormous flags on great high poles. I can’t remember what they were promoting, but it made a stunning spectacle.

White flags flutter on London Bridge

Leaden-footed folk glumly walk,

run or drag themselves from train to work.

Familiar faces from another time

now bent and creased with lines.

And the girls are still smoking

——————————-

Trapped prisoners in an open jail

so many doomed to fail.

Can’t understand where it all went wrong,

stuck on tracks that come and go,

fighting on, fast and slow.

And the girls are still smoking

———————————-

Dreams taunt lost hopes,

crushed by pride and greed.

Trust is in short supply,

ruined lives asking why?

Blame, excuses, lies.

And the girls are still smoking

————————————-

Cameras film our every move

as money rolls by on frozen wheels.

Cash falls in showers but never lands,

billions in empty boxes on display.

Cars stand silent, unwanted badges of today’s history.

And still the girls are smoking

———————————–

Why do the white flags fly?

Held aloft by smiling beauties

they fly for victory.

They fly for you and me

they fly for surrender

And still the girls are smoking

Jan McCourt Northfield March 2009

Posh Birds

I wrote this two years ago as the realisation of a real modern recession began to set in. It is a measure of something that little has changed.

The Posh, well reared birds still seem to selling, so not too much has changed there, but the economy seems to be as uncertain as ever.

 

The official mad time of year is now here and in the press, food writers, cooks, chefs and critics are fighting amongst each other to gain the greatest prominence. Wherever you look you will see reports analysing the best birds, cakes, tracklements (accompaniments to food), not to mention little black dresses, handbags, knickers and bangles.

One eye-catching headline last Saturday in the Times Weekend supplement shouted the question: “Are Posh Birds Worth It?” Having once been married to one and knowing quite a few others, my first thought was “yes, they probably are”.

Then I realised the question was being asked about Free Range Turkeys!

Within its pages, I found two references. The first from Tom Parker Bowles, who should know better, wrote, “So this year, stuff the turkey and celebrate Christmas with a proper British Feast. One of the birds he was recommending to replace it was a pheasant. Mercifully he did also recommend a really good Chicken, Pork belly or a rib of beef.

I am sorry Tom, great supporter of Northfield and others like us though you have been, a pheasant is not a replacement for a turkey. Besides, cooking a pheasant remains far more demanding than cooking a turkey.

My concern though, is what if a seriously large number of folks were to take him seriously and boycott proper British Reared Free Range Turkeys? The effect on those specialising in these birds could be far more catastrophic that the threat a couple of years ago of Bird Flu. Like everything we do, from scrapping cars to building houses, we have to consider the ripple effect of our actions.

Tom PB is absolutely right in saying that there are many great alternatives to a turkey, just don’t damn the wonderful British Farmers who are the masters at producing these birds.

Northfield Farm’s Free Range Turkeys and Geese are produced by local specialists, who do only that:  produce great ‘Posh’ birds. By all means ditch the imported or intensively reared birds of all kinds that are available in the supermarkets. Follow the rule of least remove and buy your bird or other meat from someone you know. If you don’t know that someone well, get to know us at Northfield Farm.

Further on in the section Tom Norrington-Davies (this year it seems ‘Posh’ Birds, need posh-sounding critics to write about them) answers the original question with a resounding ‘yes’

“First off, the bad news: anyone hoping to pass off a mass-produced bird as a superior hand-reared one will be disappointed. We tasted the supermarket turkeys against a benchmark of three birds from specialist producers and price would always out.”

Sadly he did not taste a Northfield Farm bird, but the principle holds good. The bird he referred to closest to ours in quality and provenance cost more than £4-00 per kilo than an equivalent Northfield Farm bird.

In some 12 years of feeding our customers at Christmas, the only complaint about turkeys I can remember was one who phoned up on Christmas Day as he was carving his bird. A good friend as well as a long time faithful customer, he was spitting with rage, complaining at how bony the Northfield Farm turkey was.  A few moments later his wife called to apologise, and explain that she had decided to cook the bird up side down that year, and her husband, taking the bird from the oven to the carving board had failed to notice and was therefore trying to carve the bird bottom up, so to speak.

Cooking your turkey upside down can help keep it moist, just don’t forget to turn it back over for carving.

Diary of a Restaurateur

Funny old game this. Last night, Saturday, we were empty. Not one single diner. Chef, me and one other, candles lit, gas and lights burning, logs on the fire and the central heating boiler fighting to repel the cold wind attempting to break in.

Today, Sunday, we were almost full with a combination of  booked tables and ‘walk-ins’. Having plenty of staff, I was able to really do my principal job which is to conduct proceedings and talk to clients.

Otherwise known as schmoozing, I am sure that this job is as important as any other that goes into the running of a restaurant. In part this is so that the client establishes a direct link with the establishment. Equally, if not more important is for me to understand what our diners want. Today we seem to have delivered well. We had a range of people from around England and abroad. Some came with high expectations which we exceeded, others’ expectations were unclear but the compliments were very encouraging for me and the team.

For some we equal or exceed anything that London’s best has to offer, for others we are doing something totally different. A common view is that if one were to stumble upon us while on holiday in Italy, Spain or France, we would be the highlight of that particular visit.

What I am trying to achieve is a simple dream choice of high quality, honest, great tasting food in a comfortable welcoming environment. Today it became clear that I am succeeding, but if we have many more empty Saturday nights, the dream may end.

Jeremy Clarkson

I suppose it is unoriginal to comment on the Clarkson ‘Affair’, but being back on the writing horse so to speak, I really can’t stop myself.

I happened to be watching BBC1′s One Show last night and so witnessed the interview without preconception or bias. Well some bias in that I do admire Clarkson in many ways. Among other things I admire his ability to not give a fig about what others think about him. However, there are many times when I think Clarkson goes too far, is something of a pillock, or even might deserve a good slap!

These sentiments do not mean that I think he should change how he is or apologise. I just switch off when I consider him to have gone too far.

Humour often requires exaggeration and success requires an opinion. Whether right or wrong, it is better to have an opinion than not.

Clarkson is a success because a very large number of people are amused by his constant sliding along the razor blade of acceptability.

On the One Show to promote his DVD, he was, in a sense, egged on to be outrageous. Matt Baker and his companion squirmed. It made great television and prompted the biggest national sense of humour failure I can ever recall.

Actually Clarkson, whatever one thinks of his humour and style, was simply keeping faith with his public persona and doing and being the act for which he has long been rewarded.

Jeremy Clarkson

I suppose it is unoriginal to comment on the Clarkson ‘Affair’, but being back on the writing horse so to speak, I really can’t stop myself.

I happened to be watching BBC1′s One Show last night and so witnessed the interview without preconception or bias. Well some bias in that I do admire Clarkson in many ways. Among other things I admire his ability to not give a fig about what others think about him. However, there are many times when I think Clarkson goes too far, is something of a pillock, or even might deserve a good slap!

These sentiments do not mean that I think he should change how he is or apologise. I just switch off when I consider him to have gone too far.

Humour often requires exaggeration and success requires an opinion. Whether right or wrong, it is better to have an opinion than not.

Clarkson is a success because a very large number of people are amused by his constant sliding along the razor blade of acceptability.

He was on the One Show to promote his book. He was, in a sense, egged on to be outrageous. Matt Baker and his companion squirmed. It made great television and prompted the biggest national sense of humour failure I can ever recall.

DIARY OF A RESTAURATEUR

There is a well-known maxim in retailing that ‘The Customer Is Always Right’. I have applied it to the best of my ability in my fifteen years or so of running my Northfield Farm Shop and Markets business.

I discovered recently that this is not necessarily the case in the restaurant trade.

Our chef had been through a very busy evening service, followed by baking almost through the night and then an early but busy lunchtime trade. We now take last lunch orders at 2-30, but then we normally kept the kitchen open until 3. At 2-55, the chef, having had no customers, shut the kitchen and went for a snooze to be on form for the evening’s work yet to come. I went through to my office to work. I had barely sat down when my phone started to ring and one of my colleagues asked me to come out to the restaurant immediately as two customers were bullying our waitress.

I went out straight away to find two people talking at my colleague, demanding to be fed. At the same time as making their demands, they were informing her, and now me, how much they disliked the improvements and renovations I had made to the building and the restaurant itself. I enquired for details of the problem and they repeated their points, claiming a right to be fed and adding that they did not like the menu either, but still wanted a meal.

Ever the mug, I considered their request, for at least a nano-second (however long that might be), and asked them politely to leave.

Outraged, they argued that I was taking an aggressive tone with them and repeated their insistence at being fed.

I would like to say that I took no pleasure in repeating my request for them to leave and explaining that I could not possibly feed someone who felt that it was appropriate behaviour to bully my colleagues while ‘dissing’ my life’s work. I would be lying though.

Last week my daughter came home for the first time from University. She granted me the honour of taking her out to lunch and we headed over to The Red Lion at Stathern. When we got there I found that we were too late for lunch. I begged, cajoled and pleaded in the neediest manner I could muster. Being incredibly kind people, they sat us down and cooked us a wonderful meal, served with smiles and skill.

I hope never to have to ‘throw’ anyone out of my restaurant again, but I do feel that eating out is something of a joint venture between the establishment and its customers. If you want a meal that is always the same, never deviating from a pre-set concept, go to KFC or MacDonald’s. If you want a little difference, something created with you in mind, come to us, or one of this area’s other great small eateries such as the Red Lion.

Our Restaurant is a great place for a party, whether private or work. We do set menus at very competitive prices.

Northfield’s Christmas Fair was on Saturday 19th November 2011. Christmas is upon us and so is our Christmas list, so get your orders in soon.

Northfield Farm Shop & Restaurant

Open for Lunch & Dinner Thurs, Fri & Sat & Sunday Lunch

www.northfieldfarm.com

jan@northfieldfarm.com

 

My previous ramblings and the feature on Great British Food Revival on BBC2 brought many of you to our Farm Shop and new Gastro Tea Room. Despite tough economic times, it seems clear that people still have an appetite for great food and especially the great value on offer in our Gastro Tea Room.

Local business, Hedgerow Spirits, maker of Melton Mowbray Sloe Gin, Whisky and Wild Damson and Vodka and Blackberry has moved to a new production unit at Northfield Farm. As well as being available in many local and national outlets, these great products are, of course, for sale in our Farm Shop. We are working on a new range of cocktails using these as a base and of course sloe picking in our hedges this autumn will take on a whole new purpose.

The Northfield Classics Menu is now available to complement our existing menu in our Gastro Tea Room. Remember that although already frequently described as doing ‘The Best Sunday Lunch Ever’ (see impending review in Great Food Magazine), we are open throughout the week in day-time for great value and great tasting meals. My current favourite is our Gammon & Chips. From mid-June our Gastro Tea Room will also open on Friday and Saturday evenings between 18-00 and 23-00hrs. We are fully licensed and hope to welcome you whether you are looking for a quiet drink or a full scale slap up meal. To launch our new evening openings we will be having two Gourmet evenings with Clarissa Dickson Wright themed on Pork & Beef on June 10th & 11th, admission by ticket only costing £50-00 per person this will include membership of our new Northfield Gourmet Club.

Sunday 14th June is Open Farm Sunday, with Pie & Sausage making demos, Guided Farm Tours and much more, so that weekend in June can be entirely spent at Northfield for Food & Countryside Lovers.

We are planning a Vintage Car Rally & Run in early July to raise money for the Help for Heroes Charity. There will be a great meal for those joining in the Rally & lots of other great food available as always.

Lastly, I am close to finalising a series of day courses for the rest of 2011 which will cover a range of Food and Farming activities. These will vary from a one day ‘General Course’ to bespoke courses concentrating on single issues such as Butchery, Bakery, Pig Keeping and Pie Making. Numbers for each session will be strictly limited and one on one sessions are available.

By the way, my Twitter Followers now stand at nearly 300, that is 100 more people than last month! Join in: @northfieldfarm

Jan McCourt

Jan@northfieldfarm.com

www.northfieldfarm.com

Took a little time to review a handful of seemingly intereted and complimentary comments on my blog. Thought it would be interesting to see who was writing such nice things.

Found most of them to be SPAM, mainly from the US. Brickmakers, Life Coaches, Purveyors of Pornography, Basketball and other salespeople all wrote positive things, but were presumably just seeking to optimise their own websites.

How sad, never mind, I’ll keep plugging on!!

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